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Jonetta Kapusta-Dorogyi, Hermann, Cahn &
Schneider, LLP
Jonetta Kapusta-Dorogi concentrates her practice in the area of
family law. Ms. Dorogi’s experience includes analysis and
litigation of complex domestic relations issues, including
business evaluation, treatment of retirement assets in divorce,
tax considerations involved in the payment and receipt of
spousal support and custody issues. As a mother of three
children, she is sensitive to child related issues and has an
analytical and practical approach to problem solving. She can be
reached at 216.781.5515 or jkapusta-dorogi@hcsattys.com.
The Center for Principled Family Advocacy,
www.famad.com
Most divorcing people with families are primarily concerned
about the welfare of their children as the structure of their
household changes. The negative effects on children and parents
in high-conflict divorces are well documented. There is little
doubt divorcing spouses should be concerned about the emotional
and economic well being of their children and themselves.
One way you can protect your children and yourself is to avoid
litigation and seek consensual resolution of your differences
through collaborative Law.
Collaborative law is a settlement process in which you and your
spouse commit to resolve your problems with your attorneys in a
win-win way without resorting to court intervention. This allows
you the opportunity to protect your children from the harm
associated with litigation and to place more value on
structuring the new relationships which will exist after the
divorce.
Collaborative law is the newest divorce dispute-resolution
model. In collaborative law, both parties to the divorce or
family conflict obtain lawyers whose only job is to help them
settle the case. During the settlement talks, all the
information needed is freely revealed and exchanged. The lawyers
and the parties try to resolve the matter in the best and most
tailored way for the people involved.
If settlement is not reached, the lawyers agree in advance not
to represent the people in court. This is called a
disqualification agreement. Its existence strengthens the
couple’s and attorneys’ commitment to settle the case. If the
divorce does go to court, you might still be ahead as much of
the information has already been gathered and some issues have
been most likely resolved.
Collaborative process means more flexibility and
control
The collaborative process allows you to take
into consideration the values, traditions and schedules of your
family members. You have more freedom to design plans that will
make sense and work for your restructured family. Additionally,
the collaborative process allows you to take control and handle
urgent temporary support and custody time-sharing matters to
stabilize circumstances while avoiding premature negotiation of
difficult issues.
In the collaborative process, if custody issues become more
challenging, you can employ a mental health professional to
assist you. This professional becomes a team member who focuses
on the best interest of the children. This professional can make
a parent aware of the impact of his or her actions on the
children.
This professional might make recommendations for improving
parenting and communication skills or suggest future individual
or family counseling which will help the children through this
difficult time. The result could be a more caring, loving and
involved relationship between the children and both parents.
When collaboration is not advised
Certain personalities and situations are not
suited for a collaborative process. These include abuse, neglect
and drug dependency to name a few. However, in most
circumstances the collaborative process will work.
Ultimately, you and your partner will be co-parenting children
together. In this relationship you will want the best
co-parenting relationship possible. Taking personal
responsibility for handling conflicts with integrity certainly
will provide you and your partner with a more creative and
individualized range of choices in resolving your issues.
It makes no sense to hand over decisions about restructuring
your child rearing arrangements to a stranger. Making a
commitment of your financial and emotional resources toward
creative problem solving rather than recrimination and revenge,
will certainly be in the best interest of your children.
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